Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Writing update #17

I'm two scenes away from finishing BURNING's first draft, and I recently got a customized response from an Agent about PAINTING! I was so excited since I only expected form rejections lol. I've got an idea as to how I can fix the issues they pointed out. Thus, I made a new outline for my first few chapters. It turns the first 2 chapters into four chapters, giving a whole chapter to each POV character. It also adds more build up to the fight that was apart of chapter 2. I still need to comb through the whole draft once I get these new updates, but that will have to wait till I'm done with the third draft of BURNING. (Kind of far away.)

I've also been doing a lot of critique circle. Enough to reach number 1!!! lol






That's probably why I haven't finished the first draft of BURNING yet. Probably ... .

On top of all that, when I lay down for bed last night, the idea for the new starting point of PAINTING popped into my head. (The old starting point is being moved to the second to last scene in the first chapter, thus keeping everything in chronological order)

Anyway, here is part of my new opening scene. (The part I've written so far lol)





            Zack slammed the door behind him and stomped away from his apartment. I hate her so much.
            When the tears rolled over his lips, they left a salty residue. The pounding sounds of construction echoed across the street from his apartment. Of the twenty odd parking spaces around the twelve-story mansion — a large Japanese apartment building — only three parking spaces had cars in them.
            If I could actually find a girl for more than a one-night stand, I would definitely never find myself crawling back to Sena … or accepting her apology. Zack sniffled.
            Click.
            Thud!
            From behind, a door opened and slammed against the wall.
            “Get your lazy ass back here right this instant!” Sena’s shrill voice ground the English language like coffee beans.
            After freezing in place, Zack swallowed. “No.” You can do this, Zack. Just stand up to her. “I’ve had enough of you for one day.”
            Sena harrumphed. “You’ve had enough of me? Me?”
            Smack!
            Something hit him between the shoulder blades.
            Zack’s knees buckled. He glanced down to stare at the high-heeled shoe. “Sena —”
            Something itched at his instincts.
            Without turning, Zack ducked.
            A second high-heeled shoe whizzed overhead.
            Zack spun to glare at Sena. “Stop throwing things at me!”
            “Then stop leaving the toilet seat up!”
            “You cut holes in my favorite suit for that?”
            Sena spat before marching forward to grab him by the pink tie. “I swear that if you ever do it again —” Using her free hand, she grabbed him by his blond hair and jerked his head back.
            Zack yelped. “— I will stab you with a knife and make you clean up the blood.” Sena stared into his hazel eyes.
            While fighting down the urge to strike a woman, Zack gulped.
            With a snarl causing wrinkles to appear on her forehead, Sena pulled at his hair again. “Are we clear?”
            “Whatever.” Zack pulled at her fingers.
            “That’s not the correct answer.” Sena tugged on his hair again.
            Zack gritted his teeth. “Fine! I understand! Now let me go before I do something that we both regret.”
            Sena released his hair. “As long as you —”
            “Short-tempered bitch.” Zack straightened his pin-striped jacket and slapped away another attempt for his hair. “I’ll come back when you calm the fuck down.”
            Sena growled.
            Zack backpedaled until he made it to the sidewalk. Why is she always like this? Everything was going so well earlier today. 


Let me know what you think. 

Comment below! 
Thanks for reading,
Travis


   

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